The Australian Politics & News Thread

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ian
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Re: The Australian Politics & News Thread

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Even more hilarious is someone getting arrested at a train exhibition. :rofl2: :rofl: :rofl2:

I've spent my entire life around train people and the most violent I've ever seen any of them get is one calling another one a dickhead and leaving. :rofl:

Guy who was banned got turned away and barged his way in, then punched someone who followed him.

AND I say, Melbourne's best suburban set is Hitachis!

Comengs!

Hitachis!

Comengs!

Ok, you asked for it.. PSSH!

YEAH, that's showin' him Barney... Pffft comengs.

Hitachis! PSSH!!

That's a brief description of what happened.
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Dr. Zoidberg
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Re: The Australian Politics & News Thread

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Apparently he was wearing a Thomas The Tank Engine t-shirt and he punched a guy wearing a Polar Express t-shirt.

He then went and took a piss on a red rattler.
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Re: The Australian Politics & News Thread

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Dr. Zoidberg wrote: Mon Mar 11, 2024 11:10 pm Apparently he was wearing a Thomas The Tank Engine t-shirt and he punched a guy wearing a Polar Express t-shirt.

He then went and took a piss on a red rattler.
:rofl: I can see that happening... A 46 year old man wearing a Thomas the tank engine shirt was arrested today for punching a 22 year old who was wearing a Chuggington shirt after the Chuggington fan failed to identify Ringo Starr as the only real narrator of Thomas.

Police have sent the 46 year old to watch Thomas and the magic railroad for 500 hours as punishment.
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Dr. Zoidberg
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Re: The Australian Politics & News Thread

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Re: The Australian Politics & News Thread

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https://www.abc.net.au/news/2024-05-16/ ... /103854882

Yes, it's news to me that pizza hut still exists. And they've been fined for what every company that has ever or will ever get your contact details do.

I'd honestly fine them so much they'd be forced into adminstration for getting rid of Hot Dog stuffed crust.

The hot dog stuffed crust pizza is the single greatest invention to pizza since pizza itself was invented, and pizza hut are fucking idiots for getting rid of it.

They may offer cheese and garlic and all other sort of bullshit, but dominos has all that other crap too.

If pizza hut want to retake the throne, 2 things: $40 all you can eat, and god damn crusts stuffed with hotdogs and little tubs of mustard / tomato sauce.

That's it, if they do those 2 things there would be 5 successful Pizza Hut locations per Square kilometre throughout all of Australia, and every other fast food would go broke in the space of a month...
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Skynet
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I cannot stand that woman :olol: I see these 2 pop up all the time
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Re: The Australian Politics & News Thread

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Never heard of them.

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Re: The Australian Politics & News Thread

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Major Asshole!
I knew it, I'm surrounded by assholes!

KEEP FIRING ASSHOLES!
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Re: The Australian Politics & News Thread

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Skynet wrote: Fri May 24, 2024 6:29 pm I cannot stand that woman :olol: I see these 2 pop up all the time
I love them.
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Re: The Australian Politics & News Thread

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OrangeRibbon wrote: Sun May 26, 2024 12:28 am
Skynet wrote: Fri May 24, 2024 6:29 pm I cannot stand that woman :olol: I see these 2 pop up all the time
I love them.
I think it's because she reminds me of my gf's friend, but her friend is way more annoying :olol:
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Re: The Australian Politics & News Thread

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Thief who stole 20kg gorilla statue from Melbourne retirement village admits he made 'silly' mistake

A search of Matthew Newbould's phone revealed text messages to friends, including one that said: 'LOL I stole a gorilla, so what?'

Image

A thief has admitted to a "very silly" mistake in pinching a beloved gorilla statue from a retirement village.

Matthew Newbould on Friday pleaded guilty to stealing the 20kg garden ornament named Garry from a retirement village at St Helena in Melbourne's north-east on 6 June.

The 33-year-old went to the Leith Park village with a friend to buy a chest of drawers when he spotted the gorilla statue perched on tree stumps, the Heidelberg magistrates court was told.

Newbould grabbed Garry and placed him on to the back of a ute he had hired from Bunnings before driving away with it.

A member of the public saw the gorilla perched in the back of the vehicle and snapped a photo before contacting police.

Newbould was arrested on 5 July and a search of his phone revealed text messages to friends, including one that said: "LOL I stole a gorilla, so what?"

He was also disqualified from driving at the time of the theft, after losing his licence in July 2023.

His lawyer, Rebecca Elder, told the court Newbould made a stupid and opportunistic decision to steal Garry and he never had any intention to sell the statue.

Newbould also conceded to magistrate Michael Wighton that he had made a poor mistake.

"It was very silly," he told the court.

Elder asked for Newbould to be handed a fine or a community work order as they were both within range for the crime.

But Wighton said the combination of the theft and unlicensed driving made the offending more serious.

He ordered Newbould to undertake a community corrections order assessment on Monday, ahead of a sentencing hearing in September.

"Just keep working on staying out of trouble," Wighton told him.

The 33-year-old's bail was extended to his next court date.

Source: The Guardian
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Re: The Australian Politics & News Thread

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I saw this on the news and I just thought why?

If you're 13 and bored I could see friends stealing the gorilla and dumping it in the creek for fun.
But after about 16, it makes no sense why someone would take it...

I'd get it if someone left their Lamborghini idling and went into the shops.
That makes sense to steal.

Or if someone stole food, liquor or cigarettes.
Again complete sense.

Even going on a crime spree and stealing all the charity tins from shop registers.
Again, I could see why.

Going into the retirement village and stealing peoples walking frames to resell on Facebook marketplace even makes more sense than the gorilla...

Usually the point of stealing is to get something of value, isn't it?
What value does a fake gorilla have?

The only way I could see taking the gorilla making any sense is if the guy worked for a zoo and their funding was cut right before they got the fake gorilla for the entrance to the gorilla enclosure.

That is the only explanation as to why someone would steal it.

Why?
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Re: The Australian Politics & News Thread

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We need to outlaw generative AI in Australia immediately!

An ACT independent senator has used generative AI to show nameless Prime Minister, and the opposition leader Lord Voldemort supporting ads on gambling...

Sure, that's bad, but worse would be that politicians could use it to make themselves not look like total shit stained cunt rags.

Can you imagine the damage that could be done in this country if a John Howard, Scott Morrison or Julia Gillard had access to this technology?

The results would be beyond horrific.
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Victoria should unban the Nazi flag and introduce bans on owning or displaying a Palestine or Israel flag.

All of them are fuckwits intent on turning Australia into as big a shit hole as the countries they're supporting.

At least there's not enough fucking Nazis to do much damage because they were already proven to be failures nearly 80 years ago, whereas we're still waiting for the results on the current shitsticks.
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Re: The Australian Politics & News Thread

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Dr. Zoidberg wrote: Fri Jan 10, 2025 4:22 pm Image
I feel like about a year ago cherry ripes went shit. They used to be fake cherry tasting chocolate bars with a bit of coconut for good measure. That's just it CHOCOLATE bars.

Now they're just a bunch of disgusting fucking coconut chunks with a tiny bit of cherry flavour and a thin veneer of chocolate to hold all the fucking coconut in one place.

It's like they're now used to simply dispose all the surplus fucking coconut chunks no one in the fucking world fucking wants.
That's what Bounty bars are for, discarding of stupidly large amount of surplus disgusting coconut.
What happened to cherry ripe??

Fortunately Cadbury make Old gold dark chocolate with cherry ripe chunks that aren't 75% fucking coconut. They are actually what a cherry ripe SHOULD be.


In politics:

The United Australia Party isn't eligible for the federal election due to voluntarily dissolving it, Clive Palmer sucks ass... But the United Australia Party had an AWESOME song.

Now Palmer is supporting Trumpet of Patriots (TOP)
I don't like how we have a trump inspired party now with just a shitload of money... But they couldn't be any worse than the fucking liberals, even if they're Trump inspired. :olol:

Trump inspired is BAD, but it's not as bad as actual Trump or Australian liberals. :rofl:
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